Susan DiMickele

This Father’s Day, Don’t Stop Praying For Your Man!

by Susan DiMickele on June 16, 2013 in Fathers, Marriage, Prayer with 1 Comment

In most families, the mother –not the father – is the spiritual driver. Sorry guys, but the research supports me. Studies identify women as the “spiritually stronger” sex – not just in church attendance, but in spiritual leadership within the family.

I’m not saying this is the way it’s supposed to be. It’s just the way it is. And such was the case in my own family growing up.

My mom got us out of bed and dragged us to church on Sunday morning.

My dad stayed home, smoked cigarettes and read the paper. (It was the 70’s after all.)

I can still remember peeling off the Surgeon General’s warnings from the bright green pack of Kool cigarettes. I would leave the warning in conspicuous places – like by my father’s “Archie Bunker” chair – in hopes that he would see the light while the rest of us prayed for him on Sunday mornings. My prayers went something like this.

Dear God, Help Dad to stop smoking. Save his soul too. I really like being his “Squirt” and I want him to be in heaven with us.

Yet week after week, he would sit in his chair, read his paper, and dismiss – and even mock – my mother’s faith.

But my mother never gave up.

Sometimes, the tension was so thick in our house that you could cut it with a butcher knife. Other times, we looked – and acted – like the happiest nuclear family on the block. And we truly were. It’s just that my mom was in love with Jesus, and sometimes I wished that He wouldn’t come between my parents – and that she wouldn’t act like such a Jesus Freak. It really made Dad mad.

But she kept praying.

God first answered her prayers about cigarettes. My dad stopped smoking over 30 years ago. And while He won his battle with nicotine, he fought another battle with cancer.

That’s when God first got his attention.

But some men (like some of us!) are very stubborn. You know the type. It was through another awful disease that God really got his attention. But God didn’t stop there. He took my father from the wheelchair to the walker. From the walker to the cane. From the cane to his feet.

Today, at age 82, my father publically proclaims his faith in Jesus Christ. You can hear his story and witness his baptism here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=mR1QZH_-WAM

But the greatest aspect of his story isn’t his physical healing. It’s the spiritual transformation of a man. A praying wife. And a relentless God.

To those of you who don’t think that miracles happen today, think again.

To those of you who have stopped praying for your husband, don’t ever stop. God never gives up.

Isn’t Father’s Day a great day to keep the faith?

[This blog was originally posted on November 18, 2012 - shortly after my father's baptism.]

Why Work-Life “Balance” Doesn’t Work

by Susan DiMickele on June 11, 2013 in Work, Working Women of the Bible with No comments

I frequently am asked the question: “How do you achieve work-life balance?”

My standard response used to be, “Well, I pray and I maintain a sense of humor.”

But then I got to thinking. Who am I really kidding? Most weeks, there is no balance in my life. Why don’t I just admit it?

And I don’t think I’m alone. The word “balance” just doesn’t describe the lives of most working professionals I know.

In a recent Harvard Business Blog, Work-Life Balance Isn’t The Point, professor Christine Riordan explains why “balance” is a misnomer:

“The term work-life balance implies that one dedicates an equal portion of time to work and life. Catalyst, a research firm focused on women in business, uses the phrase work-life effectiveness, and suggests striving for a situation where work fits with other aspects of your life.” (emphasis mine)

Think about it, balance, by definition, requires “an even distribution of weight.” If things are off even a milligram, balance is destroyed.

Which means if we expect perfect balance between home and work, we set ourselves up for failure.

In a world of technology, social media, and careers that demand nothing less than a chunk of our flesh, it’s no longer realistic to compartmentalize. The days of “my time” are over (I’m not sure they ever even existed for most women). Every time I try to draw a line in the sand, it backfires. So as much as I try to separate my personal life from my professional life, I’ve learned by necessity just to blend them together.

How does this play out in real life? For many working women, our work spills into our homes. We get calls at home late at night, usually when it’s inconvenient. Our cell phones ring in the pediatrician’s office. We bring our laptops on vacation. But the opposite is also true. The pediatrician always calls us at the office. We work at home when our kids are sick. Maybe we even take our entire family on a business trip and turn it into a vacation.

Some would accuse us of lacking balance. My response? Balance is out. Blenders are in. Why fight it?

As we strive for work-life “effectiveness” we embrace integration rather than “balance.” By God’s grace, we accept that the weight will never be evenly distributed. We’re ok during the weeks when our home life demands our greatest time and energy. And we’re also ok during the weeks when our work requires our full attention and completely pulls us in.

Do you strive for work-life effectiveness? Are you ready to say goodbye to work-life balance?

*****

Excerpts above from Working Women of the Bible, Chapter Nine.

Care to share your story of work-life effectiveness? Send an email by June 20 to sdimickele@gmail.com and stay tuned for details!

How To Get What You Want From An Unreasonable Boss

by Susan DiMickele on June 8, 2013 in Women of the Bible, Working Women of the Bible with No comments

Esther, the Queen of Persia who saved the Jewish people from annihilation in the fifth Century BC, is a master at tackling problems at work.

To start, she understands how to influence an irrational, pompous boss. If she were alive today, she’d offer a pricey yet wildly popular seminar: How To Get What You Want From An Unreasonable Boss.

She makes it look so easy with a simple, three-step formula:

Step One: Take the Initiative

Esther doesn’t wait around for her boss, King Xerxes, to fix a crisis. When she learns the Jewish people are in danger – and that a plot to destroy the Jews is brewing in the King’s inner circle – she quickly takes action. Never mind that the King doesn’t like to be interrupted when he is busy sitting on his throne. Never mind that the penalty for approaching him in the royal throne room without an invitation is possibly death. Esther takes action.

Esther shows us that taking the initiative at work means having the guts to walk into the boss’s office and make the ask.

Click here to continue reading about Esther at The High Calling.

**********

Sometimes, it’s difficult to know when to ask, when to hang low, and when to push the envelope. The Working Women of the Bible give us insight into these timeless questions.

We’re committed to sharing the stories of working women who are striving to integrate their faith, home, and work. Do you have a desire to share your story? Send an email to sdimickele@gmail.com by June 20 and stay tuned for details!

Working Moms: What’s Your Story?

by Susan DiMickele on June 2, 2013 in Working Moms, Writing with No comments

Everyone I know has a story. We’ve all gotten to this place in life through a unique and often untold journey. Most of us don’t get to tell our story in any detail.

Besides, who is going to listen?

One of the reasons I wrote Working Women of the Bible is because I was convinced of untold stories that need to be told. What kind of stories am I talking about? Stories of successes and failures. Stories of lessons learned and second chances. Stories of hard work and sacrifice. Stories of broken hearts and mended wounds.

So, what’s your story?

A powerful story has a beginning, a middle, and an end (or a “resolution”). The middle often involves a crisis, a struggle, or a series of events that are difficult or unplanned. Often, the greater the struggle, the greater the story.

If you had a single piece of paper or a “timeline” of your life, what events would mark your journey?

As important, have you told your story?

If you were asked to tell your story, what would you say?

Some of us know exactly what we want to say. We’re just not convinced anyone will listen. Or we don’t have the platform to tell our stories – we lack an audience.

Others have not even thought about “telling” our story. No one has ever asked, and we think our story is boring, irrelevant, or unimportant.

Final question. Will you share your story?

I believe that each of us has a unique story to share. It doesn’t have to be public, and we may be most comfortable (and effective) by sharing our stories privately. Yet some of us have a desire to share out stories with a broader audience. If that’s your desire, I’d love to help. You see, I am a storyteller at heart. I am convinced that a good story doesn’t just transform us, it becomes us.

If you are interested in sharing your story, please send an email to sdimickele@gmail.com before June 20. I’ll be highlighting some of your stories in upcoming blog posts, and I am interested the the ordinary, the divine, and the unexpected.

********

Have you ever considered writing a memoir? In Chasing Superwoman, I tell my story of a stressed-out, too-busy working mom trying to find peace in the midst of the chaos. Have you ever read a memoir that reminds you of your own story?

Working Mom’s Devotional: Clothing Ourselves With Christ

by Susan DiMickele on May 31, 2013 in Working Mom's Devotional with No comments

Every morning, the kind of clothes I put on determine my day. When my kids were toddlers, they would know if I was going to “work” in the morning depending on my attire. When I put on my high heals and lipstick, they would know I was headed to the office. When I put on my sweats and flips flops, they would understand that I was staying home.

This week, I talked to several working moms who have had this same experience. In fact, one mom remarked that her toddler gets upset when she puts on her “work” clothes in the morning. In his mind, the kind of clothes she is wearing determines the rest of his day. He is always excited on the weekend – when he sees that mom isn’t getting dressed for “work.”

Isn’t it amazing how our attire shapes our mindset? The type of clothes we are wearing makes a significant psychological impact on us and our families.

Similarly, when I come home from work in the evening, I can’t seen to unwind until I change my clothes. Sometimes, I am cooking dinner in a business suit, and it occurs to me – I need to change my clothes. No wonder I’m not relaxed.

I’m convinced that we likewise need to clothe ourselves each day with the proper spiritual attire. Only then can we have the mental stamina needed to get through each day.

In Romans 13, the Apostle Paul tells us to “clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ.” As I read Jesus Calling this week (May 27), I was struck by the challenge to “seek my face at the beginning of your day.” Like putting on clothes in the morning, this practice enables us to “put Jesus on” and “wear him” throughout the day.

Does your attire shape your attitude each day? Does it impact those around you?

Similarly, do you remember to put on your “spiritual clothes” each morning?

Dear Jesus, help us to “clothe ourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ” every morning. Too often, I get dressed in a hurry and forget about my spiritual clothes. When we forget to “put you on” in the midst of our busy schedules, help us to stop and change. We want to regularly clothe our minds, as naturally and deliberately as we clothe our bodies each day.